Charity – in fact, altruism in general – is a very difficult concept to explain in a general sense. What I’ve found often is that you either have an innate understanding of why you give or you don’t, and introducing the idea to someone who doesn’t see the benefit is likely to get a shrug of indifference. The best I can do is explain in detail why I give to various causes. As I often wonder, why oh why did I volunteer for another project? Another Saturday, another Sunday? Deep down in my heart I know why I always get involved. Regardless of the amount of work it involves or the "inconvenience", it simply makes me feel GOOD and a true sense of happiness in my heart. After an event, my heart is more satisfied than when I went purchased those shoes online. Although I will never fill an SUV full of piping hot beef stew again without some serious spill proof lids, I will keep cooking for the soup kitchen. Yes, I inherited the "gene" of the bottomless drive to keep giving from my mother and grandfather ("Poppi"), whom would give the shirt of their backs without a thought...and sometimes to a fault.
I believe that giving is motivated by humans’ deeply held need to find meaning in life. For most people, meaning is deeply intertwined with community connections (defining community as narrowly as family to the full community of life). Humans want to feel a sense of connection and a sense of purpose to life. Giving (time, money, energy) is a central way that we strive to find meaning.
Much has been made of selfish motivations behind giving. No doubt some giving is motived by selfishness. However, if we look to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs (a central theory of what drives human behavior) we find that while humans are driven by items that benefit them, once these needs (food, sleep, security, etc) are met, they are driven by the desire for self-actualization. Because what is good for our community is good for each of us (in that individuals in thriving, happy communities are generally happier themselves), there is a way in which giving comes back to benefit the giver. This feedback loop is wonderful, but I believe that humans’ motivation to give is rooted in their desire to find meaning through community, not the hope that doing so will benefit them.
All of this is my thoughts on what motivations humans to give. The motivations of each individual giver are of course unique. But just as we eat to satisfy our desire to live, we give to satisfy our desire for meaning.
Here I sit, exhausted and burnt out making a list of what still needs to be done for the Old Lyme Children's Center benefit home tour and the thought, "why did I volunteer for this"?. I admit that sometimes this means time away from my family and friends. I started thinking and began writing... I am fulfilled because I know that this Christmas I have done good for my community.
Please join us in the celebration! I have tickets (in advance)to the home Tour and/or donations can be made out to OLCLC mailed directly to me! Any contribution is greatly appreciated, as many people have worked very hard to make a new playground possible for the school. I know it is a very busy time for many people, but am really hoping that it is a successful benefit. I am looking forward to a very merry weekend!